monobeartheater:

verylittlebird:

a magician asks you to pick a card - any card, in fact. you do. they ask you to put the card back in the pack - anywhere in the pack, in fact. you do. they walk away. ten years later, your wife gives birth to the six of clubs. “is this your card?” the midwife asks, in a familiar voice.

what the fuck

(via spicy-vagina-tacos)

uncannibal:

epitomeofgreatness:

The video for the gif that’s been going around all day.

tHE GUY HOLDING THE CAMERA HIS FUCKIGN LAUGH AND THEN HEFALLS THE FUCK DOWN OH MY GOD JESUS DICKS IM FRICKGIN

(Source: c0caino, via fuckenlesbian)

thecompanionsdoctor:

I WAS IN MY SHOWER WHILE SPOTIFY WAS PLAYING AND AFTER LIKE 15 SECONDS OF SILENCE I HEAR THE AD GUY SCREAMING “HELLO THERE SPOTIFY LISTENER” AND I THOUGHT IT WAS SOMEONE IN MY BATHROOM AND I NEARLY FELL OVER

(via carrotsandkoalas)

spudsexuall:

It’s so fucking weird how girls can just tell when our periods start. Like the exact fucking moment. You’re just sitting in bed or standing in line for groceries and your face does that thing kind of like in That’s so Raven when Raven gets a vision

(via spicy-vagina-tacos)